Pleasure & Pain: Chapter Two

My restraints hold me aloft, immobile. I am angled so that I have to force my head up to see straight ahead. If I relax into the restraints, I see a nice view of the floor, and the repulser-style mechanism which keeps me lifted off the ground.

I feel weak and weary. My pain and thirst are my only companions. When I last felt like lifting my head to look at my surroundings I was subject to dizzy spells. But it has been hours since I had even felt like lifting my head, let alone actually done it.

When Lumiya kisses my forehead, I shiver from the coolness of her lips, I dredge up the energy to lift my head and open my eyes to stare into her green ones.

“Please Anakin, serve me, so that your pain can end, it hurts me so to see you suffer in this way.”

Her eyes are pleading, sorrowful. They make my heart jump.

I lick my lips, and can feel how cracked they are. My mouth is dry, and my tongue has begun to swell.

My voice is gritty, and as I speak, I wonder how long it has been since I’ve had something to drink. “I won’t kill Tahiri.”

Again, that predatory smile appears on her face as she turns from me and walks out of the room.

I wonder if this pain will be all I know until death finally takes me.

I wonder how it will feel to die from dehydration.

She returns mere moments later, followed closely by what appears at first glance to be a child. I look closer and recognize it to be a droid, one designed to be a playmate for the children of the rich and powerful.

I remember asking mom for one when I was five.

She sets something on the table beside me and I look at it, and think it the most beautiful thing in the world. It’s a simple glass of water, the condensation already beading up on it. I can even begin to smell the water in the air.

“We will try an even simpler task this time. For the glass of water, destroy this droid.”

I look at her green eyes once more, and am distracted as her tongue darts out over her lips.

“Why?”

“Why not? It’s just a droid after all.”

I force myself to focus on her eyes, and ignore how moist her lips seem. “How am I to destroy it?”

“With the Force of course. Use the pain you are feeling to give you power. Rip its arms off with your mind. I’m sure you can do it.”

“But you said to not use the Force for such mundane things.”

As I say it, I belatedly remembered that regardless of how much she looked like her, this wasn’t Aunt Mara in front of me. Lumiya for her part, only smiles that predatory smile. I notice as her eyes flicker up and down my body.

I lower my head again, my eyes traveling down her body, lingering on the edges of her shift.

I reach out to the Force, touching it, glorifying in it. I close my eyes and see everything, the dark oily presence of Lumiya and the spark that is the droid.

I bend the Force to my will, and deactivate the droid.

I open my eyes, and notice that I’m panting, exhausted. “There.”

I look to the glass of water, and see it gone.

Frowning, I look towards Lumiya, and she has it, and has just finished taking a large drink from it. I watch as a drop of water slides down her chin and drops to the floor.

I am mesmerized by that drop of water.

“The droid is not destroyed. Destroyed means not easily fixed.”

I look at Lumiya, the fire flashing in her eyes, and turn my attention once more towards the droid.

“Fine.”

I look at the droid, at how it is put together, and then I rip it to pieces with the Force. I start with the outer shell, and work my way in. Removing and separating every piece possible. I block all other sensations out of my mind, and focus on taking that droid apart.

When I finally remove the power supply, and the sound had gone away, do I realize that there had been screaming. I played the past few moments over again, and realized that the droid had screamed for mercy and for me to stop the entire time.

And I had been so mesmerized by that drop of water, the need for it so great, that I had not cared.

No, it is not that I had not cared, but more like I had been happy as it begged for mercy. I was happy that its misery and wants were so similar to my own.

I drop the power supply, and glance around at the destruction I had caused. I can feel the despair over what I had done begin to creep up from my heart.

Then Lumiya steps up before me, lifts my head and kisses me. All concern for the droid disappears. The pain disappears. My body is tingling as her lips linger on mine; I can feel the lethargy that has been my companion for days start to lift.

If the restraints did not hold my arms immobile, I would have wrapped them around her.

Then the kiss is over, the pain does not return, but I still feel the occasionally, almost gentle, electrical shocks of my restraints, and she is placing the glass to my lips. I sip some and my throat clenches.

She rips a part of her shift off, making it that much shorter, revealing that much more of her legs, and dips it in the water, then places that in my mouth.

We continue like that for a while, her slowly caring for me, slowly giving me water, while I just watch the ripped flap of her shift as it moves with her every movement.

Finally, she lifts the glass to my lips again, and I can feel the coolness of the water as it slides down my throat.

I look at her, once more caught up in her green eyes as they dance with amusement, happiness. I feel my own spirits lift.

Once more, she smiles at me. She leans in, her breath warm on my ear, her voice a soft, silky purr. “You’ve made me very happy today Anakin.”

She caresses my cheek; her hand still feels like fire against my skin. She then turns and walks away from me, and I just watch. Even her walk is like Aunt Mara’s. Graceful, as much the gait of a dancer as it is of a fighter.

Absently I am aware of the fact that the further she gets away from me, the more pain I am in.